EARN MORE MONEY

Welcome! I am so delighted you've taken the first steps towards increasing your profitability and upleveling your game in the travel industry.

The EARN MORE course is designed exclusively for you...with easy steps to follow to become more profitable, visible and engaging to your clientele.

The link to purchase the $49 course is www.paypal.me/themogulmom1/49

Thanks and welcome aboard!

Cheers,

Gabriella

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FISH WHILE THE OTHER FISHERMEN ARE SLEEPING

I always say that the best time to prospect for new clients is when times are GOOD.  And, the best time to get things done and make sh*t happen is when the rest of the world is sleeping. Example:

Yesterday was a holiday. 4th of July albeit in that awkward midweek spot was a bit of a respite but is there ever really such a thing for an entrepreneur? I've been back and forth with a client that is 9 hours ahead for a while now and when he asked me for a call yesterday at 4:30 AM my time, I didn't hesitate even though it was a "day off" and we had a great call which led to another early call this morning telling me we had won the bid. 

They liked what we had to offer in the proposal, of course, but they were happier to see that there was no NO, no inflexibility, a very agreeable attitude and that seemed to close the deal for them.  That was just simply a time zone issue that I had to accommodate if I wanted to win and honestly it was a 15 minute call. I just went back to sleep afterwards and enjoyed the hell out of my day with my daughter and friends. 

So, be the one that does what nobody else does- go the extra mile especially during times where others aren't. Go forward and have a GREAT week.

MY SECRET TO GETTING WHAT I WANT

ARE YOU READY?

OK, it's actually really not complicated.  I have a lot going on and people ask me all the time how things happen but the truth is they don't just HAPPEN. I have to work for them and I'm going to break it down to very core elements. You may think I'm oversimplifying it but I'm not.  It all goes back to basics, it's rather just all about how you apply them.

1. BE NICE & SMILE

Think about it. Half of the things I am able to do is because I keep my cool.  It takes no effort to smile and you never know who's going to be uplifted  just by that simple action. I get good service at the restaurants and stores I like because I smile and am friendly instead of acting entitled. I get help from an amazing network of people when I need it because I am constantly offering myself up to them on a regular basis and I give without expecting...and so do they.  A plane delay happens and I smile rather than berate a gate agent that has zero control over the situation but has complete control over who she decides to help get me on another flight so I can get home to my kid. Think about this next time you're walking around a store aimlessly lost in your own head and you want to snap at someone who's slow in front of you at a register. Offer to help instead of getting aggravated and lashing out- it will make them move faster =) and apply this to a whole host of other things in life. You'll see what happens.

2. WORK F*(*&*ING HARD

I battle constantly with my weight.  I cannot do things many others can do when it comes to fitness but I keep myself as in-check as I can because I live on a ridiculously restricted diet 90% of the time and I force myself to work out. It doesn't come easy. I am a true size 10 and will likely never go any lower. I am about 145 lbs and that won't change either but I do the best I can with what I have and I give it 120%. Same in business. I may be inclined to be an entrepreneur and I have good instincts but none of what I have would have ever happened if I was not constantly working like a fiend, keeping myself in the hotseat and pushing nonstop day in and day out. That's what it takes, it doesn't get handed to you.  Simple as that.

3. JUST ASK

Do you know how many things you miss out on when you don't just ask simple questions?  How do I get upgraded at hotels? I just ASK...  How do I snag tickets to a hot show?  I just ASK and go further than accepting a sold out sign.  You get what I'm saying - the basics are that so many people are afraid to ask. What is the worst that can happen? It's a no? Big deal...how many no's do we get a day, is that really going to break you? No- better to know than never to have asked and when you combine the ask with the being nice part, that's golden.  

WHY YOU SHOULD TOTALLY GHOST A GIRL

Attention guys: listen up because this one is for you, from us girls.  I’m just here to channel what I have learned both from personal experience in the past and from countless girlfriends of mine currently that have been through the wringer from one particular thing everyone dreads…GHOSTING.

To the ghoster, it’s an easy out, you think.  It’s a way to just disappear into the shadows, a means to eliminate any sort of emotional heavy lifting and a means for you to convince yourself you’ve done the right thing in some weird way. Am I right?  Am I close? Well, I’m here to tell you that you totally should do this if you’re not serious in any way, shape or form at the core. And here is why:

Here’s the thing- girls need answers. Girls need explanations. Girls need to talk about something backward and forward, mainly with their girlfriends but also with you especially if there has been any sort of significant time investment. And when you do the dip, it leaves us hurt, confused, annoyed, worried, sad and everything else. It’s just how we are built and it’s part of why you like us to begin with.  Don’t lie, don’t get into something you can’t handle, and certainly don’t say deep things you don’t actually mean if your MO is to get out of something by ghosting because girls don’t like it and it’s hard to handle.

But, here’s the thing after a girl gets over the initial hurt.  It’s actually very simple.  You doing that totally shows us what and who you really are, and most of the time it’s not good.  Sometimes we date you, we give you far too many chances, we forgive, and we go along with bad behavior because we like you.  We can’t quite figure you out and we continue to give you the benefit of the doubt because we believe that somewhere, somehow, in some way, you are good. You have good in you, and you CAN be good.  But, when you show us your cards and actually display this kind of behavior, it becomes entirely apparent what kind of a person you are and shows us that we have outgrown you.  You’re not what we need, so honestly, the whole “Goodbye Charlie” thing is really mutual.  In the end, it’s a huge favor and we walk away knowing we probably were right about you deep down inside to begin with.

We’re stronger than you think, much stronger than you in fact, every single time. So, don’t be a dick. If you have something to say, just say it. Speak the truth and man the fuck up.  That hurts us far less than doing the dip.  And now you know. 

 

 

 

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WHY THE CASTLE ISN'T ENOUGH

 

I did an interview with one of my favorite clients yesterday who owns a luxury tour company in Italy. What I love most about this organization is that they are constantly thinking out of the box and striving each day to be better than they were the day before.  He was recounting a story about a recent experience he created for a very affluent, discerning family who were traveling with their children who wanted a sort of medieval royal experience which included a stay at a lavish castle, and he said something so poignant that struck me to the core. 

"THE CASTLE WAS NOT ENOUGH"

Let that marinate for a minute.  This exquisite private experience was not going to suffice, the children needed more so they delivered more. They brought in actors to play princes & princesses, they staged old world events, they did storytime, a treasure hunt, and a food experience for the adults that blew everyone away.

They could have stopped at just the castle stay but instead went overboard to ensure these people, who were difficult to impress, were gobsmacked.

This is my message to you. Overdelivering is never wrong. It's never bad, even if you rarely get it in return. Especially in business...be the brand, the person or the company that gives more than expected, with a smile. Be the friend that calls the other friend who rarely initiates the phone call. Text the person who you never hear from and be there, even if they're not always there for you when you need them.  They will be- everyone's got something going on and we just need to work with people's cycles of life. In work though, there's always room to keep growing and delivering more than you promise. This is what makes you great. This is what makes you BEST.  Keep doing it. 

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5 BUSINESS LESSONS MY DAD TAUGHT ME

My Dad was amazing. Anyone that knew him instantly lights up when they talk about him to this day.  They remember his jokes and witty puns, they remember his incredible good nature and his willingness to help anyone and everyone, and they all miss him. Perhaps not as much as me, but still- it touches my heart to see how many people he reached around the world. My Dad died at 54 from a stroke and it was devastating.  But, the one comfort I can take is that in those 54 years, he LIVED. And he lived big, and taught all of us how to do the same.  He took chances, he traveled everywhere, he was successful, he always ate dessert, he always gave everything his best shot, and he gave me everything I ever could have needed to survive and thrive.  He never went to college, but he was the most naturally intelligent person I’ve ever met.  He’s really where I got all of my entrepreneurial spirit and when I look back, I realize that truly, all I ever needed to know about getting things going for myself, I learned from him. So, I share with you the Bill Ribeiro basics…which have now become my simple, straightforward truths.

1.       ALWAYS RETURN PHONE CALLS

Huge. And now this includes texts, FB messages, emails and any form of communication.  It’s just common courtesy, and more than that, respect that I think we’re losing more and more of these days in the business world.  I used to see him sitting in his office  downstairs until late at night, on the phone because he was that kind of person that picked it up and spoke to people which is definitely part of the reason he was so successful.  We all know how frustrating it is when we “just can’t reach someone” in business. When we need an answer, when we want someone’s views on something, when we want to put a matter to rest, when we want to make a sale. Having to chase something time and time again leads to aggravation, so be there and do the right thing. Be the person that takes a few seconds (because really, in many cases that is genuinely ALL it takes) to respond, to acknowledge you’ve received something that needs an answer, and if it’s a NO, just say it so the person on the other end isn’t left hanging or wondering. Be the person that gets back to everyone, preferably in a timely fashion. Even if it’s a no, the person on the other end will appreciate it more than you know.

2.       NEVER PUT ANYTHING IN WRITING YOU’LL REGRET LATER

Ah, this one stung even though I can sit here and laugh hysterically just thinking about it!   I remember a very ridiculous letter I wrote back in high school to my then-boyfriend where I poured my heart out and somehow left it in the kitchen. I remember him knocking on my bedroom door, opening it, tossing the notebook on my dresser with a funny smile, not lingering any more than he had to as to save me the complete mortification (that came anyway) and he simply said, “Gabs, never, ever put anything in writing that you’ll regret later or that you don’t want anyone to see, because it could really bite you in the ass. Remember that.”  And he walked away.   So true. Sometimes we get angry in business. We get frustrated. We get flat out pissed.  Nowadays, I like to think I’ve really evolved from that and truly, everything that I write and  I say, I honestly mean and I don’t care if it’s seen or heard because if its from my heart, I stand by it. But, if it’s something highly sensitive, pick up the phone or arrange a meeting and just SAY it live.  Talk it out. Resolve it directly if you can, and take a deep breath before responding to anything in writing that puts you off kilter.  It can make a huge difference in the long run. 

3.       GO BIG OR GO HOME (BUT HAVE A SAFETY NET)

One of the things I loved most about my Dad was that everything in his life, and consequently our lives growing up, was BIG. BIG home, BIG fun, BIG car, BIG gadgets, BIG money, BIG jokes, BIG experiences, BIG vacations and absolutely nothing was impossible.  He thought big, he dreamed big and he made shit happen simply because he believed it was possible and truly I had a blessed childhood. We had more than we ever wanted or needed….until it all fell apart.  See, the bigger things got, the bigger he risked , the bigger he spent, until one day his business went under.  Then, it became the bigger the hole he dug into to try to sort things, the bigger the hours and time and stress poured into trying to save something that couldn’t be saved, the bigger the effort he put into trying to cover it up from all of us so that we wouldn’t be disturbed until it couldn’t be hidden any longer.  I will never forget the day that he took me to the diner for lunch and had to tell me to my face that we were likely going to lose our house.  At age 14, this was like a knife in the heart and a feeling of sadness, embarrassment and helplessness like I had never felt before, and honestly haven’t quite felt since. He never had a safety net, he operated as if nothing would ever change. Fortunately we didn’t lose our house, and my clever Dad figured out another way to fix things and persevered until he launched something else he loved not long after. But, for a while, things were horribly tough and I will NEVER let that happen to me. So, NEVER let it happen to you- take big risks but make sure that at the end of the day, if it should all fall apart, you have a Plan B, or C, or even D.  Doesn’t ever hurt to be prepared.

4.       THERE IS NO FREE LUNCH

Wow, how my brother and I used to make so much fun of him when he said this with a serious face. We died laughing when he used to lecture us with this theme. Maybe we never got it, or maybe it just sounded funny at the time but now I get it.  Nothing truly comes for free, everything has a price to pay whether it’s material, emotional, or physical. So,  be aware and check everything out. Read every contract 10 times backwards and forwards.  Do your due diligence.  Dig, check things out even if an opportunity seems like it can’t possibly ever go wrong.  And check your gut as well. You’ll be happy you did.

5.       DREAM.  DREAM.  DREAM.

When you go out on your own, challenges arise but the feeling of amazement, accomplishment, and pure happiness always far outweigh them if you are doing something you truly love and pouring everything you have into it. Dream big, find a way and don’t let anything stop you. He never did, if he wanted something, he went for it until he found a way to get it (hmm, don’t know where the hell I got that from).  And I say the same to you.  Nothing, absolutely nothing is impossible and there’s always a way. When you’re out on your own, you have that special freedom to pursue it so never for one second forget how lucky you truly are to be able to be on that pathway. Use it to the fullest

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WHAT COBRA KAI TAUGHT ME

I'm training for my second half marathon which happens this Saturday and the only way to get through it is to binge watch TV series on my treadmill.

So, being the biggest Karate Kid fan ever, I delighted in the fact that they just launched a reboot decades later called Cobra Kai, which is sort of like the whole story told from villain Johnny Lawrence's perspective.

He was a jerk in the movie and still is a jerk, but there's a realness about him and a vulnerability and he said today that "In the real world, people don't do what you expect them to do"

I paused and thought about that because especially this week, that has never rang  more true. At age 43, I have never been more dumbfounded by human behavior at a business level and I have to remind myself, and those around me all the time that we are only in control of ourselves. Nobody else. How we handle things and how we react to things are entirely ours- so do the right thing, keep cool and keep being YOU.

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GET OFF THE FLIPPIN' PHONE

TIME IS PRECIOUS, DON'T WASTE IT ON SCREEN TIME

I'm writing this in the middle of international transit, where I'm waiting on the last flight leg of a very long journey.  Here I sit, in a café where I should be working but instead, I am doing what I usually do...people watching.

Next to me sits a young couple.  Now, I've been here for over an hour and so have they. Not one word apart from when they got settled and sat down. Not one real lifting of their heads or eyes, both of which are pointed downward toward the table where their phones are, in their hands. Barely a look up, let alone at each other and zero conversation.  Now, even if they're in a fight, or they've been traveling together for hours and perhaps need a little solitude, it just still doesn't seem right.

I see this continuously when I'm out to eat and it upsets me.  I don't have a ton of spare time, so the people I choose to invest my time in mean a lot to me and I can't imagine spending those precious moments not engaging in a conversation. Not finding a laugh. Not discussing what we're eating, or our days, or our lives... I eat with my daughter way more than any other friend or family member and I treasure those times where we can laugh, share stories, hear about each other's days and so on. When I am out with my friends, we want to pay attention to one another, that's the whole reason we're out.

Time is precious, minutes fleet by and before we know it, it's gone so don't waste what could be connection time on screen time.  You've got other minutes and hours to do that...

WHAT THE ACTUAL HECK?

WHEN WE TRY TO FIGURE PEOPLE OUT, WE GET NOWHERE

I had an instance yesterday that just made me take a pause and remember a sort of "resolution" that I made to myself on the 1st of the year. After being hit with a few strange behaviors by people all in a row, I just committed to not trying to delve into people's heads. I used to do it often, try to get to the root of someone's actions and understand why they would have done what they've done (which is usually something to hurt me when I've done nothing to them). And you know what?  I got my answer. IT'S NOT ME, IT'S THEM.

What I have come to realize that is when you are a good person and you show loyalty, you care, you help, and you show up, you are doing all the right things. You are thriving, growing, dreaming and achieving. So many of you are rocking it in business or are just on the cusp of doing something new and great and that's what counts- being present, being a great friend, partner, mom and otherwise.

What you do says everything about you, and what someone else does only says everything about them. Remember that.  Please.

So there you go. Print it out if you have to and recall it whenever you have one of those "what the heck" moments. Breathe it in and move on- you've got too much to do.

ADJUSTING TO A NEW NORMAL

Life shifts. Things change. Usually I am OK with traveling with the flow but to be perfectly honest, I never saw a divorce coming my way.  Yet, here I sit, about 17 months through it since I got separated and as of late December, I was officially divorced. At 43, it is thoroughly scary and although I wanted it and it was really all me driving the process, there are moments where I am absolutely terrified. Why? A few reasons.

First off, I am now a single mom. I never saw that coming either- I have the most amazing 9 year old daughter and through the whole process she was really all I ever worried about. Thankfully she’s sailed through this just fine and has adjusted really well to the schedule. Things with my ex-husband weren’t such smooth sailing, in fact most of the time it was huge amounts of stress but it has subsided.  I’ve always been financially strong and independent so I didn’t worry about money, until I wound up on the wrong side of the equation and actually had to be the one to pay out, and now I do worry about it.

What scares me now is what’s next? I feel beautifully liberated now which is great, but there’s an entire other side of me that wonders what will happen. Will someone love me again?  Can I go through all of this again? Or what if I don’t, will I be OK just being ME with my friends and loved ones for which I am extremely grateful.  At the end of the day, none of us have those answers but this is what we call life, the roller coaster ride in the dark that keeps us guessing, anticipating and surrendering to what IS. That’s what I’ve learned the most.

I’ve also learned, and I want to share, that if there is anything in your life that you don’t feel highly satisfied in, it’s never too late to change it.  I’m not advocating splitting up! This could be with a friend who is dragging you down, or a job that you just cannot stand any longer, or any sort of situation that prevents you from living your most authentic life.  We only get one shot, change is highly uncomfortable and as it happens, also very scary but if you hold on through the worst waters, the calm seas do come and you wind up on a completely different side of it than you ever could have predicted.  Be bold and make the changes you know you need to make, whatever they are, to keep you at your highest self.

For anyone out there struggling with divorce, reach out to me at any time- gabriella@themogulmom.com  - venting and sharing stories truly does help through this difficult period and I’m here.