Attention guys: listen up because this one is for you, from us girls. I’m just here to channel what I have learned both from personal experience in the past and from countless girlfriends of mine currently that have been through the wringer from one particular thing everyone dreads…GHOSTING.
To the ghoster, it’s an easy out, you think. It’s a way to just disappear into the shadows, a means to eliminate any sort of emotional heavy lifting and a means for you to convince yourself you’ve done the right thing in some weird way. Am I right? Am I close? Well, I’m here to tell you that you totally should do this if you’re not serious in any way, shape or form at the core. And here is why:
Here’s the thing- girls need answers. Girls need explanations. Girls need to talk about something backward and forward, mainly with their girlfriends but also with you especially if there has been any sort of significant time investment. And when you do the dip, it leaves us hurt, confused, annoyed, worried, sad and everything else. It’s just how we are built and it’s part of why you like us to begin with. Don’t lie, don’t get into something you can’t handle, and certainly don’t say deep things you don’t actually mean if your MO is to get out of something by ghosting because girls don’t like it and it’s hard to handle.
But, here’s the thing after a girl gets over the initial hurt. It’s actually very simple. You doing that totally shows us what and who you really are, and most of the time it’s not good. Sometimes we date you, we give you far too many chances, we forgive, and we go along with bad behavior because we like you. We can’t quite figure you out and we continue to give you the benefit of the doubt because we believe that somewhere, somehow, in some way, you are good. You have good in you, and you CAN be good. But, when you show us your cards and actually display this kind of behavior, it becomes entirely apparent what kind of a person you are and shows us that we have outgrown you. You’re not what we need, so honestly, the whole “Goodbye Charlie” thing is really mutual. In the end, it’s a huge favor and we walk away knowing we probably were right about you deep down inside to begin with.
We’re stronger than you think, much stronger than you in fact, every single time. So, don’t be a dick. If you have something to say, just say it. Speak the truth and man the fuck up. That hurts us far less than doing the dip. And now you know.